This blog post is not meant to be conclusive, but rather, it is meant to be exploratory, and I am attempting to simply gain a deeper understanding of a topic that I am intrigued by.
I have been making goals for myself effectively for about 5 years. I almost said 3, because 17 still feels like 3 years ago, how quick time flies.
When I was 17, this is when I first started to study goals. How to make them, how to make them more effective, and how to make them more implementable. I believe I was doing a lot of things right, but I believe I only have a surface understanding of what goals are. And I think that is the same for a lot of people, even the people that write books on how to achieve your goals.
The word goal, one of the earliest uses for the word(1300’s AD) was to describe “a boundary or a limit” (goal, n.). There is something revealing about how our use of the word first came from this form.
When I picture myself making goals, I am arbitrarily setting a limit in my head for myself to reach. A lot of us often compare our goals to a target. And I have often used the analogy of hitting a target with an arrow to teach about goal making, however, what is the difference between a limit/boundary and a target?
A limit/boundary is a signal for an end. It tells you where to stop, and not to proceed any further. It is a form of protection, and a keeper of order.
A target is something that was made to be destroyed, something made to be hit, or abused.
But all in all, both point to something that we want. Let me tell you a story that reveals something crucial about goals.
If you are a man, imagine having a wife, and if you are a woman, imagine having a husband. Imagine that the two of you had a child. A beautiful child that was healthy in every way. Now imagine that it was trying to walk. How long would you give it until you gave up on it walking? Do you see what I’m getting at?
Would any parent ever, after seeing their baby fall a hundred times think to themselves, “I don’t think walking is for my kid, he/she just doesn’t have it in him/her!”
Would a parent ever tell their kid, “I don’t think walking is for you, let’s go find something else for you to do~”?
No way! Do you know how long the parent would give their child? This is the key word, so listen closely– until. The parent would wait UNTIL the kid is walking. There is no debate, there is no negotiating. It is you keep falling UNTIL you are walking. There is an absolute resolve to achieve an outcome.
When you have an absolute resolve, the goal has to happen, you have to achieve success, because you will not give up otherwise. It is a sure way to achieve 100% success, because that is the only thing you will stop for. It is so simple, but yet, nobody does it. Why? Because it is hard to never give up. You have to get very good at receiving pain. You have to get very good at taking shit from other people.
However hard it may seem, I believe that the key to achieving your goals is that absolute resolve that comes with telling yourself you will keep going UNTIL your goal is achieved. Until is a boundary. Until is a boundary that you tell yourself that you will cross, that you will get to and get over. It is also a target. An image of yourself that you are trying to destroy and replace with something better.
I believe that the most successful goals incorporate both boundaries and targets. You have to have the resolve to keep going, and I shall be exploring that in my next blog post.
It’s that simple,