Anxiety usually comes from when you have a big project, or god forbid, a lot of big projects, and you are stressed out on how you are going to get everything done. The easiest and best thing for you to do is just start. Strangely, once you start hacking away at the big projects, you get into a flow state, and just keep going until you are finished. However, this method is good and all for things that you have control, but what about the things that are less material? Less tangible?
This could range from a wide variety of things, like what are going to do after you graduate? The feeling of never having enough money to feel secure. The inevitable death of loved ones. What is there to do with the things that are out of reach, whether it be through time or space?
I have one simple piece of advice. Break it down. The things that you have in mind give you anxiety because you have blown them out of proportion in your imagination. Break them down into more consumable tiny pieces, so that you can see the object for what it really, instead of something that is insurmountable.
For example, financial insecurity can be overcome by setting smaller financial goals like saving money to have an emergency fund that will last you 3-6 months of no income. You can further segment it by seeing how much money you can save each month, and set small landmarks to help you reach your goal in a preset amount of time.
But what about death? How do you dissect that? Do you even want to dissect it? Well, you shouldn’t use this practice to cheat death. Instead, reduce the anxiety by realizing what you are really afraid of. Is it the death of the loved one, or the time between that you are afraid of? The lack of time left, and you worrying about the content that you want to create, the quality time you want to spend. I think those questions help us get warmer to where our anxieties lay.
The re-segmenting of this anxiety comes with setting up time to spend, and being the best person you can for those people. Live for those people. Serve endlessly, and live for them without regrets. And most importantly, learn to let go. Everybody has a time, and to force someone to stay because of your own selfishness, is unfair to the person you so love. Their time on earth, its limitation is exactly what makes them beautiful. Be grateful that you got to be a part of it, and allow their legacy to live on through you.
Now, there are of course somethings that you can do to make this easier. Ask them questions, record their thoughts, film some conversations. Let them know how much you love them, and how you will never forget them.
It’s just that simple, but goddamn will it hurt.