Due to the fact that a friend of mine nearly attempted suicide, I decided that this was something that I needed to write.
Depression is a false perception. It is also a comforting one. It is comforting in the way that it derides its users from having to do anything, because depression will tell them that they can’t do it. Depression will tell you, “There is nothing you can do to make it better. You’re such a failure.” And as I said, it’s a false perception.
There is a grace period after a depression, where you realize how deluded you were. Depression is more of a fantasy world than an emotion. Now if any of you need help getting out of that funk, or want to help someone you know, here are a few things that I did, to help myself, and my friend.
disclaimer: I am not a doctor, please seek medical advise for dire situations such as these.
1. First and foremost, they need someone to talk and vent too.
When they talk to you and open up, let them know that they are being heard, and if you can, try to make them laugh, and lighten the mood, and show them that there are other ways to look at it. Self-deprecating humor would be great too.
Example; when my friend talked about suicide, I said something along the lines, “Why would you kill yourself” You’re so good-looking”, and that made him laugh, and feel a little better. Remember, a little better means a lot better.
3. Let them know that they always have a choice to be strong.
Depression encourages a victim mentality. They point to themselves and say, “why me?”, and they allow themselves to feel worse and worse. However, there is a crux, when people either get fed up, and choose to be strong, or crumble and die. There is always a choice.
Tell them that they have the same choice, and they can either allow what is happening to destroy them, or to make them stronger.
4.Continue being there, and hold them accountable.
I now regularly check up on my friend, and make him do some physical workouts to help him feel more assured with his masculinity, and capability to succeed, because by giving him a workout task to do, once he accomplishes it, it shows him that he can do something. I also like to give jokes, and motivational quotes every now and then.
Be there for your friends, make them laugh, and make them strong again.